Friday, July 3, 2009

Pakatan assigns three stooges as shadow cabinet committee to monitor each ministry

After frequent promises and a very long delay, Pakatan Rakyat, the informal and fragile coalition of three opposition frenemies, PKR, DAP and PAS has finally came out with a list of their version of shadow ministers.

However, to avoid further rifts in the coalition, Brader Anwar Bin Ibrahim has decided not to identify PR’s intended candidates for ministerial posts. Instead, the fragile frenemies have decided to monitor each government ministry through committees comprising of three stooges.

The list of the genuine ministers and the respective three stooges are as follows:-

PRIME MINISTER: Najib Razak
DEPUTY PRIME MINISTER: Muhyiddin Yassin
The Three Stooges: Brader Anwar Bin Ibrahim (stooge Prime Minister), Hadi Awang (stooge Deputy Prime Minister I) and Lim Kit Siang (stooge Deputy Prime Minister II)

MINISTERS IN PRIME MINISTERS’ DEPARTMENT:
Genuine Ministers: Koh Tsu Koon, Nazri Aziz, Nor Mohamed Yakcop and Jamil Khir Baharom
Genuine Deputy Ministers: Liew Vui Keong, Mashitah Ibrahim, S.K. Devamany, Ahmad Maslan and T Murugiah
The Stooges: Azmin Ali, Sivarasa, Khalid Ibrahim, William Leong, Ahmad Kassim, Fuziah Salleh (PKR), Ngeh Koo Ham, Hiew King Chiew, John Fernandez (DAP) and Nasharuddin Isa, Salahuddin Ayub, Hatta Ramli, Dzulkifli Ahmad, Taib Azamuddin and Khalid Samad (PAS).
Comment: Revealing the supposedly who’s who in Pakatan Rakyat. Except for Khalid Ibrahim, Jurublog is not impressed with the others.

FINANCE:
Genuine Ministers: Najib Tun Razak (I) and Husni Hanadzlah (II)
Genuine Deputy Ministers: Chor Chee Heung and Awang Adek Hussin
The Three Stooges: Azmin Ali, Lim Guan Eng and Dzulkifli Ahmad
Comment: When Anwar was the Finance Minister, Azmin assisted Anwar to build up his wealth through his cronies. A dangerous stooge in charge of money, and cannot be trusted.

EDUCATION:
Genuine Minister: Muhyiddin Yassin
Genuine Deputy Ministers: Wee Ka Siong and Puad Zarkashi
The Three Stooges: Yusmadi Yusoff, Chong Eng and Che Uda Nik
Comment: Unknown stooges. Really shows that Pakatan Rakyat has no serious agenda on education

HIGHER EDUCATION:
Minister: Khaled Nordin
Deputies: Hou Kok Chung and Saifuddin Abdullah
The Three Stooges: Zulkifli Nordin, Tony Pua and Salahuddin Ayub
Comment: Why these people in higher education? At least one of them should be a stooge in education ministry.

TRANSPORT:
Genuine Minister: Ong Tee Keat
Deputies: Rahim Bakri and Robert Lau Hoi Chew
The Three Stooges: Zahrain Hashim, Tan Kok Wai and Khalid Samad
Comment: Unimpressive

PLANTATION INDUSTRIES AND COMMODITIES:
Minister: Bernard Dompok
Deputy: Hamzah Zainudin
The Three Stooges: Rashid Din, Er Teck Hwa and Wan Rahim Abdullah
Comment: Rashid Din used to lead Modenas, but not successful as CEO.

HOME:
Minister: Hishammuddin Hussein
Deputies: Abu Seman Yusop and Jelaing anak Mersat
The Three Stooges: Johari Abdul, Karpal Singh and Salahuddin Ayub
Comment: Looks like PR is targeting Hishamuddin. Karpal for Home Minister? Not relevant.

INFORMATION, COMMUNICATIONS, CULTURE AND ARTS:
Minister: Rais Yatim
Deputies: Joseph Salang Gandum and Heng Seai Kie
The Three Stooges: Amran Ghani, Teo Nie Ching and Mahfuz Omar
Comment: Mahfuz Omar is only good in coming up with new acronyms e.g BN for Bini Najib. Stooge with no substance.

ENERGY, GREEN TECHNOLOGY AND WATER:
Minister: Peter Chin Fah Kui
Deputy: Noriah Kasnon
The Three Stooges: Tian Chua, Charles Santiago and Nasir Zakaria
Comment: Hooligan stooge as minister? Are they serious?

RURAL AND REGIONAL DEVELOPMENT:
Minister: Shafie Apdal
Deputies: Hassan Malek and Joseph Entulu anak Belaun
The Three Stooges: Aziz Kadir, Manogaran and Nizar Jamaluddin
Comment: Yeah right! Nizar is only good to take care of the kampong folks.

INTERNATIONAL TRADE AND INDUSTRY:
Minister: Mustapa Mohamed
Deputies: Mukhriz Mahathir and Jacob Dungau Sagan
The Three Stooges: William Leong, Teresa Kok and Hatta Ramli
Comment: You can’t attract FDI by talking cock!

SCIENCE, TECHNOLOGY AND INNOVATION:
Minister: Maximus Ongkili
Deputy: Fadillah Yusof
The Three Stooges: Nurul Izzah Anwar, Chow Kon Yeow and Che Rosli Mat
Comment: Brader Anwar Bin Ibrahim's nepotism at the highest level

NATIONAL RESOURCES AND ENVIRONMENT:
Minster: Douglas Uggah
Deputy: Joseph Kurup
The Three Stooges: N. Gobalakrishnan, Chong Chien Jen and Mujahid Yusof Rawa
Comment: Mujahid Yusof Rawa as minister? Small enough portfolio to sacrifice and give to PAS.

TOURISM:
Minister: Ng Yen Yen
Deputy: Sulaiman Taib Mahmud
The Three Stooges: S.Manikavasagam, Fong Kui Lun and Wan Rahim Abdullah
Comment: Not impressive. Yen Yen is a genuine performer.

AGRICULTURE AND AGRO-BASED INDUSTRIES:
Minister: Noh Omar
Deputy:Johari Baharum and Rohani Abdul Karim
The Three Stooges: Ahmad Kassim, Sim Tong Him and Taib Azamuddin
Comment: Another portfolio intended for PAS?

DEFENCE:
Minister: Zahid Hamidi
Deputy: Latiff Ahmad
The Three Stooges: Saifuddin Nasution, Liew Chin Tong and Nizar Jamaluddin
Comment: Saifuddin should know the corrupt practices in Mindef. He was one of Brader Anwar Bin Ibrahim’s henchmen during Anwar’s heydays.

WORKS:
Minister: Shaziman Mansor
Deputy: Yong Khoon Seng
The Three Stooges: Kamarul Bahrin Abbas, Gobind Singh Deo and Mahfuz Omar
Comment: An Indian back as JKR minister? Papa Singh must be proud.

HEALTH:
Minister: Liow Tiong Lai
Deputy: Rosnah Rashid Shirlin
The Three Stooges: Lee Boon Chye, Tan Seng Giaw and Hayati Othman
Comment: I kind of like Tan Seng Giaw. He is a good parliamentarian.

YOUTH AND SPORTS:
Minister: Ahmad Shabery Cheek
Deputies: Razali Ibrahim and Wee Jeck Seng
The Three Stooges: Tan Tee Beng, Anthony Loke and Md Firdaus Jaafar
Comment: Who?

HUMAN RESOURCES:
Minister: S.Subramaniam
Deputies: Maznah Mazlan
The Three Stooges: Abdullah Sani Hamid, M.Kulasegaran and Muhammad Husin
Comment: Unknown stooges

DOMESTIC TRADE AND CONSUMER AFFAIRS:
Minister: Ismail Sabri Yaakob
Deputy: Tan Lian Hoe
The Three Stooges: Azan Ismail, Jeff Ooi and Mohd Wahid Endut
Comment: A blogger to check on street prices

HOUSING AND LOCAL DEVELOPMENT:
Minister: Kong Cho Ha
Deputy: Lajim Ukin
The Three Stooges: Hee Loy Sian, Nga Kor Ming and Siti Mariah Mahmud
Comment: Chine chauvinist Nga set to ensure that the Chinese be given freehold land titles throughout the country

WOMEN, FAMILY AND COMMUNITY DEVELOPMENT:
Minister: Sharizat Jalil
Deputy: Chew Mei Fun
The Three Stooges: Zuraida Kamaruddin, Fong Po Kuan and Siti Zailah Yusuf
Comment: Pakatan Rakyat list of Minah Ronggeng

FOREIGN AFFAIRS:
Minister: Anifah Aman
Deputies: Kohilan Pillay and Lee Chee Leong
The Three Stooges: R.Sivarasa, P.Ramasamy and Kamaruddin Jaffar
Comment: These stooges are only good at ruining Malaysia’s image abroad

FEDERAL TERRITORIES:
Minister: Raja Nong Chik
Deputy: M.Saravanan
The Three Stooges
: Wee Choo Keong, Lim Lip Eng and Lo’lo Ghazali
Comment: City slickers trying to be smart ass

Notable omission from list: Three of PKR's stooge MPs - Mohsin Fadzli Samsuri, Zainal Abidin Ahmad and Gwo-Burne Loh. Gwo-Burne permanent portfolio is to be the cameraman. All DAP and PAS MPs are part of the stooge list.

Jurublog’s overall comment: Pakatan Rakyat really comprises of stooges.

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